Thursday, October 7, 2010

BLONDES AND BRUNETTES.



BLONDES.


ditzy.playful.fun.innocent.slutty.ethereal.coy.girly.dumb.exciting.submissive.WASPy.Stepford.
fake.attractive.light.uncomplicated.sexy.beautiful.cute.HOT.exotic.high maintenance.Marilyn.


There were some words I know I associate, or have heard others associate, with the hair colour that is blonde.
BRUNETTES.
mysterious.intelligent.serious.rigid.uptight.sensual.dependable.complicated.sexy.funny.witty.
dark.independent.exotic.Jackie Onassis.
I know I doubled up on some words there, I did that on purpose because I felt that some adjectives do apply to both pigments.
It is such an odd concept, hair colour, and the connotations that come with it.
I know that I could never go blonde.
Not because I have anything against blonde haired people (except for the blonde haired men, that is just creepy or surfy depending on where you are at in your life), majority of my good friends are blonde chicks.
I dont get the appeal of being blonde, maybe because I have never dipped a toe into the golden pool, but I know they have smeared their tresses with dark dye and it has never stuck for very long.
It interests me though, there must be something about being blonde. A certain attention, perhaps, that us raven haired lasses dont recieve?
Depending on where you are from, either hair colour could be a rarity.
For instance, in Italy I noticed the fake blonde was EVERYWHERE due to the rampant genetic pool over there producing brunettes.
Whereas, catching a dark haired girl on the Cennie might be a bit rarer.
I dont know, im just throwing it out there.
All i know is when I moved here from Parramatta in 1999 I had never seen so much sun dyed locks in all of my life.
You all looked like beautiful versions of Big Bird, flitting your yellow feathers, to my 11 year old amazement.
That was honestly the first thing I noticed about the Central Coast upon moving here.
And no im not saying its a bad thing, its just an observation.
I think as a child, you had your Cinderellas and your Barbie who were blonde role models, flying the banana head flag for the blondies out there, so upon viewing all these surf and sun kissed kids I was overwhelmed, having just come out of the most diverse cultural melting pot also known as Wentworthville.
Blondes ARE beautiful and smart and funny and the like. The ones I know, yeah.
But some are fucking idiots who play up to the aforementioned cliches. It is then when a hair colour becomes more than something that sits on your head, but then it penetrates your brain, eating away at it like a stringy zombieeeee!
Thats about all I know about being blonde. so, SHIT ALL.
This is what I know about being brunette:
1. It is rarely commented on.
2. Everyone is brunette underneath the blonde, so blondes often look at you like you are that retarded penguin from Happy Feet who didnt become a fully fledged penguin, but stayed with the fluff from when he was a baby penguin.
3. It is easier to be taken seriously as a brunette.
4. People dont usually laugh AT you.
5. It is a benefit being regarded as mysterious, rather than just OUT THERE.
6. Brunettes pull off eye make up better.
I dont want to sound biased. Im trying to tip toe around this topic because I think I might get beaten up by brunettes and blondes alike. And probably redheads most of all, because they arent getting a big enough mention. Literally that was it. Id just like to note two redheads: Marie Nunan (I think she is still red at the moment) and Amy Smith, because they rule.
Anyway, Boys probably wont understand this shit im talking about, and something funny I notice about dudes is that they refuse to admit to liking one hair colour over another (which is kind of sweet, showing that they do not purposely discriminate), but they blatantly go for the same shade every single time.
Nothing wrong with that you see, I cant talk.
Although an inordinate amount go for blondes.
I notice these things. I am weird like that.
Whether or not you are blonde or brunette or redhead (second mention!), at least you are not one of those fucking weird chicks who are stuck in 1994 with the green hair walking about Gosford train station at 10 in the morning with HUGE boots on and a belt chain.
Just thank fuck for that.
P.S. VOTE FOR ME TO BE AT THE ARIA'S DOING SWEET F.A.:

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