I wonder if in order to truly see the soul in someone's eyes, they first have to let you.
I know some people in my life who I have known for a while and yet I can honestly say I have never seen them be vulnerable.
Is this a bad thing?
Maybe because i think it hinders the process in which you can truly become close to them.
I sometimes long for those vulnerable moments in life even though many are awkward and leave you feeling empty.
That look that you can see when someone looks at you and you know what they are thinking.
The look that flashes across a person's face when they know they love you.
And the realisation that that look has disappeared.
crying in class.
tripping over in front of a babe (so dolly doctor)
spewing into a frisbee
The "weak" moments in life are usually the most memorable I believe.
It is hard to maintain a facade of toughness and "everything is fine", especially around those who are close to you, when all you and they deserve is to see you be vulnerable.
It is usually in these moments you can realise a reason why you are alive and have a heart that can break, because that is what life is all about.
That being, a discovery of who people really are and how they react.
I would love to have a vulnerable moment;
a pause before a kiss in which you decide if it is right.
a spoon in which it is so enjoyed that big spoon cant help but smush their face into little spoon's hair.
SHIT YOU CAN TELL WINTER IS HERE ,RIGHT?
IM A WALKING CONTRADICTION.
Maybe it was the weekend that has just passed which is making me all piny and in need of a cuddle.
Nippy weather can do that to you and you dont even realise it.
Ill tell you something though, even if I did have a man to come over in the late hours of a June night, why are winter pyjamas so disgusting?
It would be impossible to get your rocks off anyway because your there in your Supre fluro pink trackies and oversized old man sloppy joe, possibly with a hand knitted pair of slipper/sock or slocks as I just called them just now sitting in a foetal position in front of a heater!
The poor guy would come over and see you there with a green tea and walk straight back out the door again i would like to think.
How did I go from "love" to "winter boning", ill never know.
But think about it, Im talking to girls here now I think because none of the boys I know seem to give a flying fuck about what they wear to bed. Most wear their birthday suit, which is why I am scared to knock on closed doors in their house.
Summer PJ's are so much more..."hey baby, oh what these? No I sleep in them, I swear."
hottie shortie shorts
maybe even hottie undies and a big t shirt.
And yeah, I know we are technically in Autumn. But I dont believe in Autumn mainly for the fact that this fucking season spread out a years supply of Don Burke's mulch in my Redfern backyard last year and still wasnt entirely cleared up in time for my 21st in SEPTEMBER.
So to me, Autumn is bullshit.
Entirely off topic.
Anyway, In these incoherent ramblings of a slowly insane, trackie dack clad boy cut clown that I am, all Im saying is.....
Id like to see deeper into some of the people I know
wearing fluro PJs two sizes too big
spewing into a frisbee.
never know, this could be the weekend for it!