YOU ARE AN ISLAND.

I know its all about what brings us together as a human race that is whats important.

But I do wonder how groups in society dictate treatment, acceptance and segregation amongst other cliques that roam around in everyday life.

I can not say today that I have never exclaimed some sort of judgemental remark in regards to some sort of social group.

E.g. I was guilty and sometimes still am, of referring to the 'emo' period of my teens.

We arent shocked anymore by much.

Different types of people (whether it be with mindset etc) are accepted as they are (but only if there seems to be enough people supporting the cause...well enough to not overpower anyway).

Its seems as though these 'types' of people are like lions and gazelles in the jungle. A power struggle to survive and celebrate who they are without fear of being metaphorically swallowed up by another 'type' of person.

If im not being clear, Id like to give you an example of what I mean.

There are a group of people who wear the same things, talk the same way, are interested in the same things and usually have an aversion to anything different than what they feel fits their profile. Here are two stand out groups that I have noticed recently who are quite the opposite. Now I know this seems like a generalisation (which it is, so fucking deal with it)

1. JOCKS OR FOOTY PLAYERS & FOOTY CHICKS.: BOY- Usually wearing a tight t shirt, maybe footy shorts, bootcut jeans and leather looking loafers, short back and sides (I know I am generalising, just go with it). They talk in a macho manner. They are interested in footy, girls, drinking, mates, making money and team related sports. They usually have an aversion to hipsters.

GIRL- Body Con dress, curled long blonde or black hair, excessive make up, heels, petite frame. Interested in boys, going out to drink, shopping, dancing, football games. They usually have an aversion to hipsters.

2. HIPSTERS or DIRTY FUCKING HIPSTERS: BOY- Long hair, beard, tight jeans, basic t shirts, ratty clothes meant to look ultra chic, some kind of vintage accessory such as shoes or sunglasses or jewellery, tattoos. They speak in a long drawl usually with the word "man" strung out and used frequently. They are interested in 'Where the wild things are' paraphernalia, photography, fashion, New York City, Alternative indie music, asexuality. They usually have an aversion to footy heads.

GIRL- red lipstick, short hair, long bed hair with regrowth, dark eyebrows, androgynous style, long tops worn with long skirts/ pants, boots, tattoos. Speak in a long drawl. Interested in obscure cocktails, oxford street, looking off into space and ignoring conversations, fashion, New York City, magazines with weird names and weirder fashion shoots inside. They have an aversion to footy heads.

Now that I have shown you an example of what I mean I have actually forgotten what my point was. Oh yes, now I remember, The power struggle. While both the footy heads and the fucking hipsters think they are right in their own worlds, and the latter is not, the struggle to prove that they are on top is one of futility and exasperation, as these two 'types' will rarely see eye to eye.

Im bored of the power struggle. Im bored of being heckled about how I look by people who I do not know and who do not want to understand me or the way I look, but would rather criticise it and revert back to the schoolyard taunts of year three.

I swear to god if one more person on this god forsaken Central Coast calls me a man or a boy or calls me 'sir' or refers to me as a transvestite one more time I am going to fucking find out where you live and go Samuel L Jackson on your sad little chode dick ass.

Id like to say it doesnt bother me, but it has come to a point where Ive had enough of it. And for some reason, its all from the male species. I never realised how much of the male ego needs to be boosted at any time of the night just like a new born baby who needs to be fed every three hours. Your fucking ego's are like retarded tamagotchi's that shit themselves every two minutes forcing me to want to take your batteries out and hide you in the cupboard.

Im bored of the narrow mind I come across daily.

Im bored of hearing "fuck that chick is sooo hot" only to see a cardboard cut out of the latest zoo centrefold in front of me...every....time....

Im bored of hearing the same stories over and over again.,

Im bored of hearing your opinion on shit that doesnt concern you.

Im bored of judgement and disdain.

Im bored of trying to impress.

Im bored of being angry and yearning for a change.

Im bored of expecting too much and being let down.

But most of all, I am bored of being bored. I want anarchy, I want something revolutionary

Because as Ive mentioned on this blog before, I think we are all becoming too numb, jaded and lazy with actually living and not just killing time.

THINGS I HAVE LEARNT PART TWO.

1. People you knew are no longer people you know.

2. chest infections suck.

3. smoking while having a chest infection sucks harder.

4. Everyone has a favourite position.

5. Hot showers when you are burnt do not feel good. (but are necessary)

6. The older you get, the harsher the hangover.

7. Mexican themed anything rules.

8. Babes are everywhere if you just open your mind.

9. Music is likened to scent. A tune can remind you of a time or a place just like a smell can.

10. Looking at people really close makes them pretty cute.

11. Everyone is on a pedestal of their own making.

12. Complaining will not solve a problem.

13. Christmas is bullshit.

14. No matter where you go in the world, you can drink a coca cola.

15. Hot weather dulls the appetite.

16. White shirts look babein on boys.

17. Slutty is not sexy.

18. Contradiction is present in everyday life, in everyday conversations. It is unavoidable and quite funny when you think about it.

19. No matter how happy people are for others success, there is always a tinge of jealousy hidden underneath.

20. Being defensive pushes people away.

21. You can run and you can hide, but you can never escape (my love...thanks enrique)

22. Girls DO slightly enjoy being heckled by boys driving by in cars.

23. Life is moving at an increasingly fast pace.

24. Kissing is very important.

25. Everyone has an opinion, its whether or not you choose to listen to it is what counts.

26. Some advice I heard from a scholar and a gentleman lately- "Be like the weather."

27. Isabel Lucas and Angus Stone are a killer couple.

28. The world will not end in 2012.

29. Tequila is delicious.

30. 'Love it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free...to be more like the man you were made to be."- Mumford and Sons.

POWER BALLADS & SEALED SECTIONS.

I was listening to Jon Bon Jovi's hit power ballad, 'Always' just before as I was zipping around the place, and I got a little too into it as it just really went with the weather and the faux 80s pain in his voice just made me identify with the brunette leggy babe who just bailed on him, leaving him shirtless in some light blue jeans.

Its a song that makes you want to tease the hair on your head and kiss some babe who has red lippie on just to get it all over your face, then walk in slow motion down some form of grassy hill with her running behind you in despair in a navy blue dress that would be seen on a 90s version of winona ryder.

Thats if your a man, or so inclined to the woman I described above.

Power ballads from the 1980s and early 90s are like the nutella in a ferrero rocher.

Creamy and surprising.

(much like something else I know).

They describe so much sorrow and pain but with a killer guitar solo slung somewhere at the 7 minutes 43 seconds mark to satisfy the air guitar niggle you get whilst listening to this in your car.

They fucking rule and one day I want to, i dont know, make up some I phone app that allows you to set a soundtrack to a day in your life, because 'Always' by Bon Jovi will definetly have a spot on the list.

Speaking of lists, here are my top 5 power ballads & accompanying favourite lyric from the song:

1. Always- Bon Jovi (obviously).

[I wish I was him with those words of mine/

to say to you til the end of time/

that I will love you/

Baby, Always/

& Ill be there forever and a day/ Always.]

2. Purple Rain- Prince

[I never wanted 2 be your weekend lover/

I only wanted 2 be some kind of friend/

Baby I could never steal u from another/

It's such a shame our friendship had 2 end]

3. November Rain- Guns n Roses.

[And when your fears subside and shadows still remain,/

oh yeah/

I know that you can love me when there's no one left to blame/

So never mind the darkness we still can find a way/

Nothin' lasts forever even cold November rain]

4. Home Sweet Home- Motley Crue.

[You know that I've seen/

Too many romantic dreams/

Up in lights, fallin' off the silver screen]

5. Every Rose Has Its Thorn- Poison.

[Though it's been a while now/

I can still feel so much pain/

Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals/

but the scar, that scar will remain]

All with poignant and melancholic lyrics and killer guitar solos.

Not to mention, if you youtube most of their original videos you will feel like you lost your virginity all over again due to seeing some of the hard nuts of hair rock gyrating around the place but with pain in their eyes (due to love lost or their dealer being out of town- we are still not sure).

PART TWO:

Sealed sections in magazines make me laugh and be pissed off at the same time.

Do the chicks who write about how to give gobbies and hand jobs seriously expect people to memorise this shit and perform it at the right time?

Because I can barely imagine the look on a guys face if you suddenly pull out your cosmo mag and tell him to "hold on" while you flick to page 56 and study a well drawn diagram with your hands around his cock and your eyes set on the glossy pages trying with all your might to concentrate on the "orange juice technique".

If I see one more sealed section telling me to juice him, I am going to set up and FB event everyone to a massive sealed section bonfire (with free lamingtons and cordial provided- NO orange juice).

But what I really love to hate is the drawings. Imagine spending four years at graphic design or art school and having to end up drawing some robot looking chick licking the tip of a well endowed mannequin.

Even better are the bogan looking couples they get to pose semi nude (you know, with the lady covering his dick tattoo with her elbow and the like) and tell all about their disgusting love life.

If I wanted to know what you two do with a box of popcorn in Greater Union, Id wrangle myself a student ticket and sit behind you.

But No I dont want to know, and I dont want to see awkward questions that are sent in (or more likely made up by the staff) about 'How do I go down on my man if we are at his nanna's 85th birthday party, but Im really up for the nookie?'

To be met with some generic answer such as,

"Well thats a bit inappropriate, you could just wait to get home at 2pm because Nan needs to be changed and put to bed around that time. Or you could get set to it in her coffee table room that no one is allowed in, but be careful to place the doilies back in their original position."

I suppose the only advice Ill be taking is from Bret Michaels or Vince Neil before I ever take the advice that comes with the tearing of a strip of paper.

Every magazine has it's thorn.

DESIRES.

Have you ever met someone who you cant stop thinking about?

All the tiny moments that arent occupied by some trivial bullshit that dictates the routine of your day are filled with this person.

And somehow those tiny moments seem just as important or even more so than the bigger thoughts.

Do you ever imagine things with that person?

Things you might do together.

Things you might see.

Or do you ever wonder if at that exact moment, that person is also thinking about you?

Do you see a photograph and get instantly reminded of this person, whether it be some form of pornographic art or maybe a photo of an empty wine cup in a gutter.

Is every nerve ending filled with desire for this person, pulsating at an abnormal rate until you are drunk on the very thought of them?

How do some people ignite such a desire? how do some people penetrate into your skin, and other do not?

What is it about these chosen few that generates such electricity?

I wish I could answer all these questions, but it is another mystery that we as people must come to terms with. And maybe not question, but just go with your desires to find out where they may take you.

On a lighter note.

I have always been fascinated with a term that I have heard come from a few boys lips, that being the....

"WANK BANK".

I have heard (mostly from the boys i used to live on campus with) that some men take mental snapshots or remind themselves to store a certain moment for later, for what is otherwise known as their wank bank.

This image or moment comes in handy when they hop into bed, and its raining and they are all warm and snuggly and they reach down and remember that really hot hoyts employee who ripped the ticket real hard and fast.

Or maybe when they derobe and hop into a nice warm shower and think back to when the waitress with the long legs bent down to pick up a teaspoon she had dropped earlier that day whilst getting a mocha.

I personally do not have a wank bank.

I never see a guy walking along the beach with his dog and think "yes I am going to savour this image so I can go home and touch myself to it."

I of course am not representing every single male I know. I have heard from a few sources about this bank, much like the commonwealth (except with less % interest and no ATM fees), and I have always been interested in it as it reveals yet another side to the male psyche.

You boys are just so interesting to me!

I remember one lazy afternoon hanging around Villas in second year, this talk of the wank bank and the long list of occassions and girls (some of which we knew) were deposited into the bank.

But then again, I also walked into a room once in the middle of the day and four boys were watching porn together.

So maybe the moral of the story here is, Dont move on to university campus if you want to get punani regularly.

HOSTEL.

There might be something missing in another persons life to treat others with such hostility.

There is always an underlying factor that the hostilee is not aware of.

Once met with hostility, the hostilee will immediately question what has happened to be treated as such.

Usually, nothing has really been done that is THAT bad to the hostile one to use such icy methods of payback.

Is hostility a childish concept, filled to the brim with passive aggressive nuances that probably effect the hostile one more than it could ever effect the hostilee.

I have come across GREAT hostility lately from people who I once regarded as friends.

I never knew that they had it in them, and I still am in disbelief that they hold such ignorant venom spurting from their self made fangs, hell bent on making me question what the fuck I have done to them to deserve such animosity.

Well I know what I have done...

NOTHING.

Not a thing. It is a selfish and self righteous burden that hangs upon their asshole shoulders eating away at the very fabric of who they are as a person.

It is the over 8 years of age version of a tantrum.

No wait scratch that, I probably did something so small and trivial, but in their tiny tiny tiny worlds it is like a ten on the richter scale of irritation or disappointment.

I am tired of questioning what the fuck I did wrong to this narrow tunnel of a human being, and I am tired of being made to feel guilty for an invisible fault.

I am also tired of putting up with their shit, and I find the fact that I am treated with this hostility exhibits the kind of person YOU actually want to be,

a spoilt little brat uncapable of obtaining any of their desires due to a jaded, narcassistic misery lump they refer to as a brain.

Go and be a sad little bitch, I am starting to begin to wonder if I should start to act in such a way that actually warrants this hostility.

EQUAL & OPPOSITE REACTIONS.

for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Remember that?

I have come to realise that this is true, the consequence is one of the most reliable elements that come with human behaviour.

Whether or not you realise or want to acknowledge it, the shit you do affects others.

I sometimes dread making decisions purely for the fact that I know that something will usually come out of it, good or bad you wont know until the proof is in the pudding (i have been watching ALOT of come dine with me episodes lately).

I wish you could just act and say the things you want with no consequences, but its just not the way it is.

That is why I find myself bottling up anger, mistrust or disappointment because I am scared to confront the situation, due to the reaction of an outpouring of what is really wrong.

I dont like to be abandoned, or ignored, or forgotten by people who I thought were close to me.

It produces a reaction that is unsavoury within me, and i feel that one day i might pop like a balloon or an old condom.

I wish i were brave in that aspect and didnt want to run away from conflict and hurting the nearest and dearest.

But sometimes its just not worth saying how you are feeling, especially when you know it will not change anything.

Its just the thought of putting it away somewhere, who knows where and ignoring the niggling feeling that you were made to feel like shit.

You cant rely on everyone to do everything right all the time, which is another reason why it is sometimes not worth bringing shit up, purely for the fact that everyone is human and makes mistakes.

It is only when these people realise their mistakes is when it is worth it, but that is a rare quality to come by.

No one wants to be a nag, or look desperate or like a whinger, but then again no one wants to be a doormat either.

It is a constant push- pull, a war of the ages within our minds struggling to come to terms with the fact that maybe your opinions or feelings dont really matter.

As much as I dont want to accept existentialism as a real concept to my life, I think it is time to realise that I am alone (figuratively speaking).

And I should react accordingly.